Amadeus is one of my favorite movies. Salieri is the protagonist in this movie. All of his life he has wanted to write music. He has a deep passion, a longing for it. He knows God filled him with this desire. And cleared a path in his life for it to happen, with the unexpected death of his father.
Salieri is the court composer for Emperor Joseph II. So he’s not small in the worlds eyes.
Salieri and the Emperor are together when they first meet Mozart. His music has proceeded him. Everyone is eager to meet the boy genius.
For Salieri’s sake, this meeting should have never happened. It was a mistake that was beyond measure. It crushes him. He becomes upset with God. God gave him the desire to write music but not the talent. It went to a “child, crawling on the floor.”
Mozart’s music was simple but beautiful. It flowed naturally like a river flows to the sea. Each note was well placed. Move a single note and the whole piece would fall apart. Salieri’s heart bled for the music that he desired to create. Why? Why did he have this burning inside of him? Why was God tormenting him with this “child”?
Have you ever felt like Salieri? You wanted something so badly. With such desire? You used so much energy to achieve a goal only to see someone else dance away with it? Or maybe the prize was never yours? It happens every day to everyone of us. And we have all done what Salieri did: “why God why?”
You can have someone tell you all day long that “it’s going to be okay. God’s got this. God’s got you. God’s not finished with you yet.” It’s all true, God does have all things in the palm of his hands. But there is still that sting of rejection, deflation, or utter heart break. Whatever it is, it will get better. But too often there’s a daily reminder of just how hard you fell. Just how overwhelming that failure was. “If at first you don’t succeed try, try again.” Bitter words sometimes. Especially if you feel like you’re being led, given a purpose, or inspired.
I encourage you not to get caught up in comparing yourself to Mozart. You’ll never measure up. You are a child of God. You have been created in his image.
Okay, so you’re not Mozart. Is what you’re doing pleasing to God? Is it giving you joy as well as glorifying God? Salieri wasn’t setting the world on fire by Mozart’s standards. Before he met Mozart, his heart was in the right place. His work, his passion was a gift from God. After he met Mozart, the devil used the situation to harden him and fueled a hatred for God.
Psalms 37: 4-5 “Delight thyself also in the Lord, and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart. Commit thy way unto the Lord! trust also in him and he shall bring it to pass.”
Stay focused on God.
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