Your Disability
Esther and Oscar were cuddled up on the couch. She was lying in her favorite spot. Listening to the beating of his heart. Occasionally, she would open her eyes only to see the rain still pouring down. The brick wall of his house was a rainy blur.
“How do you think that window would look with a window seat?”
“What made you think of that?” He asked.
“I’ve always wanted one. I think they are romantic. But I wonder if it would eat up too much of the living room?”
“It would need to be big enough for both of us.” He suggested playfully.
She snuggled into him a little deeper.
He shuffled slightly under her. She could feel his chest move, as if he was about to speak. But he didn’t. He did it again. She wasn’t going to push him. Finally, after several minutes, “I got fitted for a hearing aid today.” He stopped. Was there more?
So she asked, “is it a little or a lot?”
“There is a little hearing loss in my right ear. My left one is the bad one. I have tinnitus. It has been spiking at night. Thought I might need to do something about it.”
“Is it part of your childhood?”
“The ENT didn’t think so. She thought it was from an untreated sinus infection. The damage, in her opinion, doesn’t warrant an MRI. So who really knows.”
“I’m sorry. If I may ask, how is a hearing aid going to help tinnitus?”
“Sound therapy.”
“Okay.”
He held her a little tighter. “Ess, it crushed me when she started talkin’ about ‘your disability’. Ways to cope with ‘your disability’. If she said it once; she said it 15 times, ‘your disability’.”
“Have you talked to your mom about it?”
She felt him let out a long sigh, “I don’t think there’s much point.”
Poetry & More 
gonna fly now
not as high now
lmao
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Down low
Real slow
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well yes of course. now lead me to that alpine car cd player with usb chord. ha
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Those are so last year. 🤣
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but i like them and so want them!
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I saw it. I wanted it. I got it.
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very macarthurian Jolene.
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Not nearly as historic. I was thinking about Ariana Grande lyrics in 7 RINGS: ‘I see it, I like it, I want it, I got it (yeah)’.
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i want them to stop blocking traffic. but obsession is a poor man s possession.
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“obsession is a poor man s possession”, I like that.
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it morphed into a poem. thanks for the poosh. there s a place near me behaving badly and some of the powers that be said hey go to the city meeting , they will give two minutes to show them how they should have not allowed this to happen. and i thought hey wait is that not passing the buck?
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Not sure how it works where you are; city meeting here happen during the day, usually at 11 or 2. If you work at day job. It’s almost impossible to go. Passing the buck (I think) would depend on the situation. Not knowing all the details, sometimes the people we think all power really don’t. Thank you for sharing your poem.
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my pleasure. it is a major development that has been allowed to block traffic for a gestation period. as to having power, i do have my doubts about any maximum efficacy with two minutes!
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Agree. 2 minutes is very restrictive. Sorry about your traffic headaches.
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Is tinnitus a disability? I’ve had it for almost a decade now and every doctor I’ve talked to said I just needed to get used to it. >_<
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It depends on what you read. This says yes and that says no. I was told (at first) that I needed to used to it. Then when I got my hearing aid, the talk has sort of changed. Now the conversation is about sound therapy. The doctors was hoping that the addition of a hearing aid would stimulate my ear. It can’t tell a difference. But when I had my last hearing test, I had no new hearing loss.
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With that being said, I have noticed that I haven’t had a many night spikes. There is an app I used for a while called resound that would play all kinds of noises through your phone to help mask the sound. I would love to make it just go away.
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I’d love for it to just go away as suddenly as it came too. ^_^
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Amen! In the grand scheme of tinnitus, mine isn’t bad. It sounds like standing under a high voltage power line 24/7. I guess it the sound therapy was going to work, it would have by now? 😢
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Mine varies from day to day. Sometimes it’s in one ear, sometimes (like today) it’s both. Sometimes it’s really loud, but sometimes I think it’s gone… for a minute. >_< I haven't tried sound therapy.
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