Winter Season

Text, text, text……

Since the time his mother called, he had turned off his phone. Esther was in the kitchen heating up some leftovers. “Look at this.” Oscar laid his phone on the table. He had ten missed calls from her, three from his sister-in-law, five from Doris (as if he would even call Doris back), and twenty-five text messages from his mother. “What do I do with them?” He sat down at the table utterly deflated.

“Have you read any of them?”

“I haven’t the heart.”

“I think you need to save them.”

She handed the phone back to him, “more covering my ass?”

“Afraid so.”

“I’m done Esther. I’m so done. No more trying to have a relationship with people that aren’t real. No more worrying about what they think or how they feel. I have told myself on many occasions that I will get to know my nephews when they come through my class and looks like that is going to be the case, nieces if I have any. He spun the phone around in circles. “I have tried to remind myself that mom is mentally ill. That she can’t help this. But she is doing the hardest job known to man, she is raising my nephews. Tell me how you can be crazier than a Bess bug and raise four children.”

“Do you think it’s all an act?”

Oscar looked at her with disgust on his face, “God help me I’ve thought of that.” He rubbed his fingers through his hair. “But I was with her two of those times she got put in the hospital. I saw and she told me the things she did. It can’t all be an act.”

“Maybe having the responsibility of the children is keeping her grounded?”

“I’ve thought of that too.” He let out a long sigh, “am I a bad person?”

She held her hands out for him across the table, he took them.  “No, my love, you are not a bad person. You want what every child wants. That’s why grown adults that have been adopted spend their entire life time’s seeking their biological parents. It is the rare child indeed that can say they don’t care.”

“Is that what I’m saying?”

“No, what you’re saying is treat me like an adult and I will treat you like one. I’m not a cash cow, you can’t abuse me whenever you want, I’m a person too.” He just sat there, lost in nothingness. “What can I do?”

He got up from the table and walked out the front door. She followed him to the door to see where he was going. He started walking toward the lake; it was plain to her that he was going to talk to his dad. She cleaned up the kitchen from the not touched dinner, then got in her jeep and followed him. He was sitting on the bench with his head in his hands. She put a blanket around his shoulders.

“Dad would be so mad at me.” He snubbed.

“Tell me why?”

“I had my brother put in jail. I’ve abandoned my mom.”

“You didn’t have your brother put in jail. And your mom abandoned you a long time ago.”

Oscar looked her right dead in the eye, “did you have him arrested?”

“No, I text Chet for help. I told him your brother was there, he was drunk and creating a scene. Oscar your brother did this to himself. Drivin’ under the influence is against the law. He assaulted you, again, against the law.”

“I just can’t help feeling there was something I could have done differently.”

“Okay, let’s start from the beginning. Why did you let him in?”

“At first, I didn’t know he was drunk. He always smells like beer.”

“Why did you text me?”

His voice quivered, “I needed,” he took her hand in his. “I needed.” With her free hand she caressed his cheek, she didn’t say a word. Didn’t need to. He took a deep breath, “you make me stronger. I knew that if things went bad you would know what to do.”

She placed a light kiss on his cheek, “be mad at me if you have too. Be mad at Chet. But don’t you dare be mad at yourself. You didn’t do anythin’ wrong.”

“Then why does this hurt so much?”

“Because you care about them. Because you love them.” He fell against her shoulder.

“Let me take you home.” After several minutes, he stood, holding out his hands to her.

Winter Season