You Forget What it Was Like to be Alone.
Like a birthday, I stay busy burning boxes
so I don’t have to do any talking.
I love people
I just stay in my head
I get in a flow, thinking up ideas
and when people talk to much
I forget.
And it comes off like I’m depressed
or upset, but I’m not. Some time
during the week I feel like a
robot.
Clearing tasks, and moving fast.
and just as I’m finishing up the last
it’s time for bed.
and I’m so caught up in the moment
I forget, I just want to rest,
I respond coldly out of exhaustion
Because I’m sick of hearing
people talking
Trying to wind down the conversation
the way folks say
“Well, what time is it?”
When they want to leave.
But then she is asleep
And my mind slows,
I take longer breaths
a weight lifts off my
chest and I realize this wont last
life wont always be like this
I won’t be falling asleep in a house
with our kids, older family members
on my mind, and most of them are
still alive.
And I regret how I acted,
You’re there sleeping beside me,
I lock the doors, and check on the
kids, watching for a breath
before I get back in bed. You move
a little
and I wish I’d been kinder.
I go through all my mistakes
and pledge not to make them
the next day
but then I wake up
with a surge of adrenaline,
afraid
of what the day might bring,
and arm myself against
the people I love.
Bio:
Artist and poet from South Eastern KY. With poetry I’m trying to find resonate novelty. When someone hears a topic being discussed publicly they’ve only experienced privately, it creates this sensation like “this is very real” “This person gets it”. It’s a principle of comedy writing. It can’t be too common, else it reads like a horoscope. Poetry won’t solve any problems, but it will make one feel better knowing they are not alone.
I try to write happy life affirming poems with positive messages, but hide them behind cynical language, and depressing topics. There’s no reason to ignore the hard truths of life, but we can talk about them, and go on together elevating these emotions to art.
With art I just like to make things that feel cool to look at. I don’t have theories about it. I’ve just always enjoyed looking through art magazines, as a child I couldn’t wait to read the booklets that came with CDs and videogames, just for the art, and want to replicate that experience myself. Make things that look cool. I make very busy art, lot of motion and detail. It would fall in the lowbrow/ pop surrealism category.
https://youtube.com/shorts/6ZgUEOcVZiw?is=X_gk1kX4SSAO2I4l
https://dandelionscribes.com/publication/aliens-auras-and-the-abyss
